Anaín Bjorkquist

men are simple not stupid

For reasons unknown the Celestial Planning Committee decided to only give me male children. I get to raise Kings instead of Queens. In watching my sons grow I am learning that the male species is driven by sex from a very early age. Tonight, out for a walk with my Kings, DII, just barely from within ear shot of me very quietly said to his older brother, “Check out the HOT chicks in front of us,” then he continued, “I like the one with the longer hair.” Now, if he was a teen, hell maybe even a preteen, I wouldn’t be shocked AT ALL by what he said but he doesn’t turn seven until September so, I was a little surprised. When I asked my son what made the chicks hot he gave me a short and honest response, “They had pretty faces and short skirts.” The girls he was referring to were teens wearing very short skirts. The fact that my sons who minutes earlier had no other objective but to get to the park as soon as possible, were now walking very slowly staring back at these girls made me chuckle.

I chuckled because it truly is easy for us women to garner attention from men, if we fit a man’s attraction profile he will pause and take notice. If your looks can stop a man in his tracks then you now have an audience ready to see what else you have to present. Men have no problem admitting that they are visually driven and that yes, indeed they are more likely to initially pay attention to women they find attractive than to those they do not find attractive. Which brings me to ask the question…

Which is worse, men paying extra attention to attractive women purely based on looks or women who are attractive purposefully using their looks to get attention from men?

It seems to be an instinctive thing for men to be drawn into the more attractive women then why is a woman using her power of attraction looked down upon, specifically by other women? Women are quick to undermine another woman’s achievements if  she seemingly got her foot in the door based on looks. Why if we women spend so much time, money and effort on looking good are we so quick to belittle another woman for being noticed for her looks? If Shorty has an ass stop traffic like a red (yes, anytime I can work Trina song lyrics into a post a stripper gets her angel wings and I’ve achieved my purpose in life) or if her face has men taking double takes…why should she feel bad about that?

Women advertise yet they still suck their teeth when they see a pretty woman walking into a room causing men to turn their heads…as if they didn’t work on trying to turn heads too?!? ¿Qué? Some of you ladies from one side of your mouth are saying that the reason why you work so hard on your looks is for yourself but the next thing you are doing is advertising?!? ¿Qué? Yes, some of you are advertising…constantly! You update your Facebook status about the hottest “Come Fuck Me” heels you just got and how fine you look in them. You tweet about how you’ve been on your game in the gym and you are shaming “hoes”. You are taking pictures in front of your mirror and sending them to Twitpic with a caption about how great you look. Actually, I’m not sure if it is advertising you are doing or self-adulation?!? I won’t even try to lie I’ve done some of it before so how’s about I give y’all an example of shameless self-promotion…

I hope that most women didn’t give two shits about the fact that there is a picture of half naked me on my own site. If it made you upset I’d love to know what about it made you upset or uncomfortable, especially if you read this blog regularly and know I write about sex and do so very candidly and graphically.

Ladies, where do we draw the line in the sand when it comes to respecting women who are comfortable working what nature gave them and those that allow men to objectify them? How can we know the difference if we are not that woman? So, the question really is when are we going to stop judging what the next woman is doing before taking time to get to know her?

Men are never going to stop looking at the “hot chicks” in front of them and they are never going to apologize for doing so and they shouldn’t have to apologize for their instincts. YES, there is a lot of power in a woman’s outer beauty but no matter how simple a man may seem he is still a thinking being and to keep his attention a woman needs to have more than just looks! Our outer beauty might fade but ya best believe that inner ugliness grows quicker than weeds…

© Anaín Bjorkquist May 26, 2010 ~ All Rights Reserved.

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